Monday, March 29, 2010

Cca #9: Faith?

My time as guest blogger is almost up and there are a couple things more I want to tell you about. One of those things I haven’t really gone over is faith.  A belief in God generally helps people get through the rough patches. 
At times I have been asked how I deal with having an incurable illness, chronic health issues, etc.  I have been asked about my religion, whether or not my belief in God is what gets me through.  I don’t want to dwell on religion or God in this blog.  I just wanted to offer my version of “faith”. 
Being of a certain faith helps people in tremendous ways; it gives them hope where there might not be any, it keeps them positive, it aids them in living healthier lives, and also helps them live more fulfilling lives. These are things that I have observed for myself.
However, I never was part of any faith while I was growing up. Although that’s not uncommon by any means, I have found that a lot of people with CF, or any other chronic illness, are brought up as a member of a religion. It’s logical that having a belief system and faith in a higher power would help someone who is ill. It’s also safe to say that the people who experience illness through a loved one would also need that support. I know that the subject of religious beliefs can evoke strong discussions and emotions; what is true for some isn’t true for others, and what helps some might not help everyone. But I know there are people out there like me who don’t belong to a church, but who seek spiritual enlightenment and wellness. I know there are people like me who have made great strides in dealing with chronic illness without having a religious affiliation.  
My mom always taught me to look further into the world so I could really experience all that life had to offer. She taught me to believe in myself, and to make decisions in life based on what I thought was right or wrong, to understand about consequences of decisions I made (both good and bad), and to live in such a way that I would have no regrets. She allowed me to be an individual, and gave me freedom to form my own beliefs and make my own choices. Though I started as a baby with no beliefs, I eventually sprouted some, and here I am today 20 years old, my mind chock full of beliefs, some of which I have already shared with you in my previous blogs.
I don’t bother with questions like “why me?”, because it gets you nowhere. That is a dark abyss from which you may not escape, so don’t go there.  It doesn’t matter why. We are living in the present, and trying to live for the future. Everyone is eventually going to kick it.  Life is terminal.  So just live it and live it well!
I believe that I can steer my own course and create what I want out of life.  I believe that my sheer intention to live is the senior reason I am alive to blog about it.  I love my life.  I told my mom once that I didn’t want to hear doctors tell me how long I had left and that I would stick around as long as I was interested in being here.   I really don’t know if God has a plan for me or what it would be.  But, I know that I have a plan for myself and so far it’s worked out pretty well.

Love,

Phoebe

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